Send a letter

Recently I had a conversation with a colleague of mine about the written word. Interestingly a generation apart, we agree - nothing touches our hearts and souls as deeply as the written word. Words that have had time to mingle with thoughts and marinate with ideas before pen is put to paper.

In this digitally savvy time, there are so many ways to share such words. Texting, emailing, via social channels, but none seem to have that depth as the written word - from pen to paper.

This conversation sparked a question within. Why is that? Why do words written from one's hand to paper seem to have more depth? According to Robert Cialdini, (well known for his book on persuasion tools - I book I recommend reading.) writing words affects us deeply because we commit to them.

And on some logical, perhaps deeply ingrained psychological way, it makes sense. Let's break it down a bit, shall we?

Social media tends to be a blast of information out to the masses. For the most part it's impersonal and lacks the personal touch. Even a heartfelt birthday message on Facebook (for example), feels cold when you know everyone is reading it.

Texts and instant messages happen at the seemingly the speed of light. There are websites dedicated to the humourous errors that come from these speedy exchanges. Bottom line, people are barely paying attention to the words that are sent.

Emails tend to have more thought, structure and depth to them. Sometimes they can even be downright thoughtful and touching. And yet seeing the words on screen is a far cry from holding a note or card in one's hand.

So what is it about the written word? I know personally I've always felt more when I write pen-to-paper. (Be that my journaling or writing a letter/card to those I love.) I have actually pondered this question many times over the years. I've always felt that the written word is more powerful and emotionally invoking. It's why I will randomly send cards to my friends or family once in awhile. Why not surprise them with love in the middle of, say, August, when they aren't expecting it.

Personally, I think the written word is more powerful for two reasons. First, putting pen-to-paper is more permanent in that once the words are written, it is much more challenging to make changes. (Unlike any of the digital ways to share words.) Therefore act of writing words on paper forces one to dig a little deeper with the choice of word, the flow of thought and the overall message one wants to share. After all the words are out, they are forever out and you have committed to them (see above).

The second reason, comes from this feeling commitment. Thoughts become real. Thoughts by their very nature are abstract and speedy ways of communicating find conversations flowing every which way. The ultimate purpose of the shared message may get lost in the shuffle. But a letter is one way communication (or really slow two way communication!). The point? Writing a letter forces a focus we lose in the ever accelerating world of communication around us. It asks us to slow down and pay attention to what thoughts are most important to share. We commit to the words. Fold them into a letter, embellish them in a beautiful card or within an envelope with a stamp. We purposefully send the words on a trip from one soul to another.

I write quite a bit in many formats. I know, whenever I sit with an empty card or a blank page with pen in hand, I am always more aware and thoughtful of the words chosen to be shared in this format. I take a moment to ponder my path, and then, I let the words flow and I don't look back. For me, I fill those pages with words from deep within. No longer do I dance within the leaves of the tree, but deep within the roots we all share.

There are so many ways in which we are able to communicate with the people around us. For each method there is a purpose. A quick call to get an answer nearly immediately (unless you get the dreaded voicemail!), or an email/text to share information. Life is all about choices we make or that are made for us. Why not choose to send a letter when and where it matters most. That special ability of a letter, to reach beyond time and space never seems to disappear. Not even in our current digitally savvy ways.

"Please don't send me flowers; write me a letter instead."